Express an Opinion…

Having just found out the delightful news that my closest friend was going to be a grandmother, i immediately took the opportunity to give some advice to the expectant mother.  Or should i say, express an opinion.

When I first got pregnant, I got the best “advice” ever given to me. It was from my cousin, the mother of three boys and a girl.  She actually gave me two pieces of great advice.  She told me, first, “Never take anyone’s advice.  Listen to your heart and to your doctor.” 
There was solid reasoning behind this most ridiculous statement. You see, when my cousin was attempting to nurse her first born, she was encountering some difficulty.  Her mother suggested that perhaps her milk was too thin and the baby wasn’t getting enough nourishment.  Her mother-in-law, on the other hand, felt that her milk was too rich, and the baby was having trouble digesting it.  This is when she learned to listen to the advice she so graciously gave me.  She went on to have three more healthy, well-nourished children, who, by the way, are all healthy, well-adjusted, thriving and successful adults! 

The second pearl of wisdom, was that when I was at a point of total frustration with the baby, on one of those colicky nights when I couldn't get him to stop crying, or when she was in the middle of a "terrible two" tantrum, it was suggested that I think of the "dumbest person I know who is a mom, and tell myself if she can do it, I can do it."

I am reminded of the time we asked a friend of ours, who was carrying her first child, if she knew the sex of the baby.  Her answer we found funny, or maybe placed her in that category of who we might call to mind when we needed a little hope, because she told us that “the baby won’t decided its sex until its four months old.”  With slight allowance for a language barrier (although Hispanic, she had been born and raised in the states), it was then that my husband and I knew we could face parenthood.

My advice?  Listen to my cousin’s advice.  Don’t take any advice… Listen to your heart and your doctor!  

And one more thing... Express an opinion, but send all advice by regular mail. doctor!


Q and A

How Would You Answer That?

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? What is the meaning of life? “Why do fools fall in love?” These are great questions that have no answers, or at best debatable ones. It reminds me of the kinds of questions that would silence a room full of adults, because nobody knew what to say, and it would ultimately result in someone blurting out, “You better go ask your mother.” The only problem was, that in those days, even your mom didn’t talk about that stuff.

In today’s world, we are much freer with the flow of information to our children. We’ve learned that ignorance may be bliss but it is also irresponsible. Consequently, I never had a problem answering the question, “where do babies come from?” I usually countered with a question, to see what my son or daughter really wanted to know. It often led to interesting conversations that skirted the specifics, thankfully.

In fact, the only question ever posed to us by either of our kids was when our son asked “What’s a chemical?” Now try to explain that in terms a three year old would understand… He heard the word on a television commercial. We couldn’t come up with a good way to explain it. Nobody could.

I think I’m just glad there were no commercials for Viagra twenty five years ago. Imagine his questions then~